Yet another Monday has come and gone. Only four more work days to get through. There is something about feeling that way that is quite sad to me. I feel like I am just trying to get through five days of the week, and that seems like such a waste to me. It makes me wish I was doing something that felt meaningful to me, not just something that produced a paycheck. Still, there is no doubt how thankful I am for that paycheck, but I keep looking for something more meaningful.
Lately I have found myself questioning a lot of things. No answers yet, just questions. It must be the fact that I am getting close to 50 or something. I try to look in my heart, try to listen to what it surely must be trying to tell me, but either I am not sensitive enough to hear or there is nothing to hear. I am pretty certain it is not the latter, so I am faced with the task of learning how to hear better. It is not an easy task, but I continue to try. I sometimes wonder why something that seems to come so easily to others is such a difficult task for me. I'm almost 50 and still wondering what my purpose in life is. I thought I knew, once, but that was long time ago and so much has changed since then.
I think it's time to call it a night.